Sunday, March 25, 2007

I'm in DC...

Well, Maryland, technically. Visiting with Amy and Bryan, who had their first child almost six months ago. Baby Samantha is so adorable--a full head of hair; dark, staring eyes; kicking legs. So sweet and calm.

Ashley and I took the Chinatown bus down together Saturday morning. It was an odd juxtaposition--both of us were out late on Friday night (although separately)--till 4 am (which is not an unusual weekend occurrence for me), and so when we met at the bus station before 11 am, we were both in rough condition. After weakly exchanging updates of our night's adventures, we spread out in different rows and proceeded to sleep the entire 4-plus-hour bus ride to DC. In a way, it was perfect.

And now we're in the 'burbs. Amy and Bryan generally go to bed around 9, when they put baby Samantha to bed, and that was perfect for Ashley and me under the circumstances. I went to sleep around 10, woke up at 7:30 rested and ready to go. But it's striking how different our lives are. Having a baby changes everything (duh). Bryan was commenting that even though he and Amy are homebodies by nature, their lives were still turned upside-down, and he wondered how much more shocking the change would be to a couple who goes out a lot.

I love NY and I want to raise city babies. I know people say you never really feel ready, at some point you just have to do it if you know you want kids. I'm so far away from that point right now, but I know that in a few years (okay, more than just a few) when I near 40, and if I'm not in a relationship, I'll have to start thinking about having a child on my own. But I fear how difficult that will be from what all of my friends with children have told me. They can't imagine having to do it all on their own.

But I don't have to worry about that yet. For now, I'll enjoy my visit to the suburbs (we're meeting up with my cousin's family--two kids!--for brunch today), and then return to my city life as I know it.


saramoohead said...

Oh, Samantha is SO gorgeous! And my nephew has that same arched thing, I think.
As for having babies as a single parent: single parenthood is successful all the time, producing happy and healthy and wonderful kids.
It would be hard, but ANY parenting is hard. You would be a fantastic mother and so if you want to, do it! You would make it work, just like every family makes it work. And you'd never be without support. You've got all sorts of city baby friends!
You might not have wanted such a rant from me, but I couldn't resist. Perhaps it is my own baby hankerings (not so far off) speaking.
If you can give a baby a loving, happy home (which you can) I think the circumstances shouldn't be important.

Rita said...

I'm fascinated by this post. I've stopped short of blogging on this exact topic so many times, and, well, I'm stopping short in this comment, too. You and I should talk!


Cheryl Kobe said...

Having been raised in the city, I can attest to the fact that I had an amazing childhood and wouldn't have wanted any other way! But, like many people I left when adulthood arrived and greener grass called from afar.

In my humble opinion, having a child is difficult, but soooo well worth all the grief. Just one look at that photo captures all the joy that only children can give!

Libby Koponen said...

That baby is adorable.....and she looks soulful, too (or maybe all babies do?). Too many thoughts on single parenthood to write down here!